Love is on its way

I'm baaack

2009-12-08T12:45:00.000-08:00

I've decided to come out of blogging retirement..well it was more of a hiatus. But a lottt has happened since my last post. But why sit here and blog about the past..whether it was good, great, bad, or heart breaking. I must say I do feel like a part of me is missing. I know, Jennifer's back and she's complaining..I am. Buuut, it's weird. Something walks into your life and you never expect it to turn into what it does. Then again, you never expect it to end the way it did..or at the time that it did. Music is what keeps me alive these days. Every morning I wake up to music I leave playing all night. (I'm not gonna lie..I put Justin Bieber's song "One less lonely girl" on repeat and leave it on all night) and I put music on in the background while doing my school work, the rest of the day I'm singing it, and I listen to music in the endless hours before I fall asleep at night. It's what keeps me going.

Good Lord!

2009-10-08T10:28:00.001-07:00

Sooo I'm really only on here because I skipped my school work the

past few days..I only did the bare minimum which would be assignments

to be turned in and not the 20 page reading lessons. (yes you read a TON

with online schooling). Soo if you do the math...I have 6 classes. One lesson

each day. I skipped some days, and I have todays, and then I'm doing tomorrow's

work (well I was planning on it anyway..) since I'll be gone all day. So as you

can see I'm kind of in a rut. I usually just do my school work every day and it

takes an hour or less to complete it since I usually work on it late at night.

(I decided to take my insomnia up on a more positive note and be productive

while I wait for sleep to come..) annnd now I've been sitting here since 11AM

(yes thats when I woke up) and its currently 1:30 PM and my attention, concentration,

learning ability is gone for the day..and I still have 4 days of US government/Politics

left annnnd 3 days of Pre-calc. UGHHH too bad the average American attention

span is only 20 minutes...and continuing to fall. Or else maybe I'd be able

to actually get this stuff done. I've been on every website I can possibly access

to try and avoid this. Apparently taking little "breaks" doesn't work. You

basically just shut down your thinking status in your brain and its

impossible to get it back up and running. OH well.

Its destiny

2009-10-03T19:50:00.000-07:00

Never underestimate the power of true love, my friends.

Life can be tough, hard, cruel, rough, unfair, misleading,

and not as you would like it to be. But hang in there.

"If you're lucky enough to find that one person, the other

half of your heart, your true soul mate...hold on to them.

And never let them go."No I have no experienced true love.

I'm only seventeen. But I do believe my soul mate is out

there. I may or may not have met him. I may have a hunch

or I may be naive. But God is telling me to go on and be

strong. This is the only life I'll ever get. The good lord

made someone just for me. And He is watching me along

this long, endearing journey as I slowly make my way

along His path. And he smiles down upon me, like he is

tonight. And I return my heart felt smile. You should too.

Yes I had a very good night. It was probably one of the best in my life.

I am very happy and nothing can bring me down right now.

MISS BRANDIE I HAVE SO MUCH TO TELL YOU :) (& YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN! )

Can somebody help me..

2009-10-01T08:08:00.000-07:00

So I used to be a straight A student (with a few occasional B's, no biggie) and I used to stay up at night working on my school work for the next day or two or three. That's how crazy successful of a student I was. I don't know what's happening to me... I can't focus on my school work for anything! No, not just my school work... I can't read leisurely like I used to, I just can't focus on what I'm reading. I can't practice my violin for as long as I used to. I used to be able to stand there and play for almost an hour, and now I can barely do it for 10, 15 minutes tops. My grades at the moment are at an all time low, I have 2 D's, 3 C's, and 1 B. JENNIFER LYNN ELIZABETH WICKMAN! How the heck are you supposed to get into college? I dunno =\ Right now I have 6 classes worth of work to get done but I just CAN'T. You guys don't understand. I can't look at anything like I used to. What's wrong with me?! I can't sleep at night. My average time of falling asleep is around 5AM. If its any sooner I consider myself lucky. I have this kind of 'anxious' feeling all the time. It's weird. I'm falling apart at the seams and I don't even know what's going on!

I've just realized

2009-09-27T18:03:00.001-07:00

I've been lying to everybody who's asked me "why did you leave Harrison?" or "Why do you do school online?" I make up excuses like "it's something different" or "because I wanted to help my mom around the house more" (that last one was one of my points in presentation when I was trying to get out of school actually, I said I'd be able to help out around home more since I'd be there more...it worked apparently.) The one reason that was true was "I absolutely hated it there. I couldn't stand it." This is the sad truth that I am only going to tell and talk about ONE time. And that is in this blog. For once I don't care who sees this and I don't care what they think or say to others. This is something that I JUST realized tonight. The truth is I'm trying to grow up too fast. Well that is the over all case in point. Those are the only words I can think to summarize all of my thoughts and feelings that I was going through towards the end of my brick & mortar (term for a school building) days. I really did hate it there. It might have been the winter months that caused those ugly days, and the teachers that weren't giving me the grades I worked for, and the kids who lived to party and do drugs and what not. I couldn't stand being in that environment. I felt myself and my education deserved better. (not that I'm better than anyone at Harrison. I know I'm not the only one who feels the same way, I just actually did something about it.) Anyway, I felt school tied me up. Around these months I had started getting lots of calls from agents and production companies that wanted ME to come and audition. No way was a rundown, bankrupt, nasty school building going to hold me back from my dreams. And that is the absolute real reason I left school. I'm not sure if my mom knows that to be the reason. She may have a hunch that something with my mass calling for auditions had crossed my mind as a good reason to leave, but not the main one.

Today on Facebook, I saw a video of the 'flash mob' the psychology classes did in the lunch room. Seeing the school in full effect, I actually-for the first time ever- felt a longing to go back. I wanted to walk those halls again smiling at my friends as I passed them in between classes, socialize at lunch and during classes. Be able to feel the relief and freedom of driving home in the afternoons, having a reason to put make up on and dress nicely for people to actually see me. I will never again admit that I want to go back. It will never happen so it is worthless to even try and persuade me. It will never work. I'll never be back. I do wish I hadn't tried so hard to put my high school days behind me. I may have a little under two years left, but I cannot help but feel a little upset with the fact that I am not longer apart of the Harrison school community. I do feel left out. But that was a choice of my own. I wanted out so badly that I never thought I'd see the day that I would feel even the smallest amount of what I'm feeling now. I wouldn't say that I regret leaving. I do like sleeping in, working for an hour or a little over on school work for the day, then having the rest of the day to myself. It's a sweet life. But not as sweet because you have no one to share it with...However, I will put this behind me and stick it out here at home through my graduation. Then it is off to college and away from this town forever, so why would it matter if I miss a year or two with people I may never see again? Like I said before I'm trying to grow up too fast. All I think about is college, then after that, and whats next, and when I should get married(I haven't even met the guy yet!), and how old I should be to have kids, and so on. Those things shouldn't be in my head at all. I just turned 17. This is the prime time of my teenage years. Why the heck am I trying to sprint full speed ahead of them? This is the only life I've got, and I should wish for it to go as slowly as possible. Every adult tells me "you're only young once, so enjoy it as much as you can." If only I could.

Texts from Last night

2009-09-23T10:53:00.001-07:00

I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.

Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours

a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.

I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.

you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.

if i died would you start the facebook group?

He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.

The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue

LETS GO REDSKINS!
- Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.

Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did

all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.

some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page

youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?

How did people poop without Blackberrys?
- Motorola Razers?
- Stone age, man.

Meet Blanket

2009-09-20T16:35:00.000-07:00

So after eating at Olive Garden for my birthday dinner (9 days late but hey, better late than never..), My mom had this brilliant idea to stop at Petsmart just to look at the kitties and doggies since we didn't feel like just going home. Well there was one tiny little kitten all alone in her cage and me being the amazing little girl who can make it look like her heart is breaking at the thought of leaving a kitten behind (for those of you who remember me talking about Summer from the no-kill animal shelter a few months ago..it was a sad heartbreaking ending..) and I wasn't about to have that happen a second time. So when we were holding her of course we fell in love. I named her Blanket 30 seconds after we first saw her and I knew if there was the slightest chance to get her I had to name her, and fast. Well it just so happens that during dinner the name Blanket, as in Michael Jackson's son, had come up and I declared this to be the name of my next dog...well it apparently ended up being a kitten that I'd unknowingly have within the hour. But the story behind the Blanket Jackson is Michael said the purpose behind it was "blanket of love". So for those of you who made fun of the child or my new kitten, think of that saying because I think it is a beautiful thing. Gorgeous. Blanket is now sleeping on a blanket right beside me and I could not be happier. I just hope the vet lets us know that she is healthy and won't contaminate the many other animals we have at the zoo here in my house. (4 dogs, now 4 cats, 2 gerbils, and one tiny robo dwarf hamster.)

"Mommywood" Tori Spelling

2009-09-10T11:41:00.000-07:00

Her books just keep getting better and better. This book was mostly about her and her husband, Dean McDermott having kids and becoming a family, finding the right place to live together, making all of her mother/wife dreams come true, work, her show, he first book, her friends, where she lives, the problems she encounters on a daily basis, her creativity, her moments of embarassment, her children growing up, (well for the past year or two since they're young), her mother, her first book, her life as she has it and loves it. There's not much more to it for me to tell you about. Tori Spelling has an interesting life that the world loves watching on TV and reading in her books. And I'm just one of those people.

Feel free to laugh...

2009-09-08T07:36:00.000-07:00

For anyone who cares I have a 108% in my Fine Art course right now.

Yesterday, I just finished my first still life for a studio this year and we

are to take a digital picture of the artwork and send it in to our teacher.

I am no artist myself, but I try my best anyway. I thought I'd share with

all of you on here my final piece and see what you think. I'm not sure how

good/fair/poorly I did on it, but I'll find out soon enough once its evaluated.

"Crash Into Me" Albert Borris

2009-09-08T07:32:00.000-07:00

If any of you have ever heard of Ellen Hopkins (author herself), she gave some insight on this book and shared her own personal knowledge with this author, Albert Borris. I read this book one day a work and it was a bit bizarre to be completely honest. I was good no doubt, just different than the perky romance stories I'm used to reading. This book is about four teens who have all attempted suicide yet failed and are now on a road trip to see the grave sites of their idols who have committed suicide as well. Once they see all four graves, their journey is said to end in Death Valley, CA...I'm sure you know what they plan on doing there; therefore I won't need to say the gruesome truth. These four teens share their stories with each other along the way. The hardships of their lives, their attempts to take themselves from this Earth, all the pain and suffering behind what the public eye sees. It may be a little depressing, but it has its happy and cheery (if you can call them that) moments as well.

"Message in a Bottle" Nicholas Sparks

2009-09-08T07:26:00.000-07:00

I've never seen the movie to this book, so I can't tell you the differences and similarities or whether I liked one over the other. So I'll just tell you my opinions on this book. Of course, it's Nicholas Sparks, therefore I loved it. I seem to fall in love with all of his novels. What's new? I'm sure I'm not the only one. The only other love stories I can stand to read are Stephanie Meyer's 'Twilight' series. (*thousands of teenage girls screaming*) This book touched on the subject of death from the beginning. Garrett is a man in his thirties living life day to day suffering from the pain of his wife who died a few years ago. Theresa comes down to visit him to see the man who wrote the heartfelt letters full of grief and pain she uncovered one day. For anyone who's had a long distance relationship, this novel touches on the hardships of that...as if being in love with your deceased wife and a new woman wasn't hard enough.

Why not

2009-09-08T07:21:00.000-07:00

You think you're going nowhere when you're walking down the street.
Acting like you just don't care when life could be so sweet.
So why you wanna be like that, This is nothing new .
You're not foolin no one you're not even foolin you.
So walk a little slower and open up your eyes;
sometimes its so hard to see the good things pass you by
There may never be a sign no flashing neon light tellin you to make your move
or when the time is right. So why not take crazy chance? why not do a crazy dance?
if you lose the moment you might lose a lot so why not.
instead of listenin' to your heart you do just what you're told
if you keep waiting where you are oh what you'll never know
You'll never get to heaven or even to LA if you don't beleive there's a way

why not take a star from the sky why not spread your wings and fly

It might take a little and it might take alot But why not why not

I must finish what I started

2009-09-05T15:44:00.000-07:00

So just by looking at my blog you can see that I post reviews on the books

I've read. Wellll, I seem to have fallen a little bit behind. It's a lot of work

for me to sit here, get a picture of the cover from google, recollect the book,

type my thoughts/opinions/ feelings, and then do it again for the next book.

I'm not sure if anyone even cares that I do that, but it makes me feel like a-

well I don't know really, but a-something-important. And I kinda like knowing

people's opinions before I read a book so I don't know if anyone else agrees

or if I'm just weird-could be. But anywho:I'll play catch up sometime this

weekend. I saw Miss Brandie Renee Potzick posted a blog that she hasn't

forgotten about life here and I decided I should follow her idea and do the

same because it's rude to leave 7 blog followers hanging. (I'm not sure if its

7, but thats my guess). Anywayssss enjoy your labor day weekend everyone!

*If you're going anywhere please tell me so I can be jealous while I stay here. =\

Is this a bad thing??

2009-08-28T06:39:00.000-07:00

-Something inside of me has changed-

No, not physically. And not really mentally either.

I guess you could say emotionally...?? Possibly.. I guess.

But something is very much different. A part of me wishes

I could just get my GED and be done with my academics;

but the other part of me is slapping myself silly with that

thought. Who are you kidding? A good education is what

is most important here. Why would you throw that away?

Stupid. Of course I want to go to college. Of course I

know where and what for. But why does it have to be so

da-gone expensive? A decent college costs as much as a

house these days. I can't make my parents pay for that!

-But in the mean time-

Other things have changed in such a short while it seems

as if it happened over night..I guess that's possible. You see

something from a different point of view or something new

opens your eyes and you can change like *that*. I don't really

feel comfortable saying exactly what did change me, but it was

something that made things that seemed important once to me,

now seem pointless. I don't feel that I need to be an A-list social.

I feel that texting to my close friends once in awhile will suffice for

hanging out with all of my friends (close and not so close) every

weekend or free day I have. I guess it's because my sister is pretty

much my best friend and I'm with her all the time so it feels like

I'm always with my closest friend. Sure I have others, but I feel

like they don't make too much of an effort anymore, so why should

I? Sure friendships and relationships need a little work from both

sides, but they shouldn't have to be forced. I guess I'm more focused

on my future and where I'm heading with my life as opposed to living

now and trying to make time stand still. It's not possible-so why try?

August 26-27

2009-08-27T15:52:00.000-07:00

Sooo as you all probably know I went to Columbus yesterday

and last night to see the Jonas Brothers perform. My mom, sister,

and I left yesterday afternoon. We ate dinner then Jess and I got ready

and headed to the concert. Honor Society and the Wonder Girls

opened for them. (due to schedule conflicts Jordan Sparks couldn't

perform) but the highlight of my night was seeing those three

boys work their magic on stage. Jess and I were in the third row

so we got some awesome pictures that I put on facebook. The videos

I posted on my youtube channel (http://www.youtube.com/xjenniferlynnx).

It was an amazing night. One of the best parts was when Joe and Kevin

were on this rise thing and they were spraying people with guns that

shot out white foam. So since we were so close they sprayed us. The

life they were on went in a big circle and when they were right above us

Kevin looked down at me while squirting us and I blew him a kiss. (he

may not be Nick or Joe even, but still..)

But of course after an AHMAZEINGG night there has to be something bad

happen. And I awoke in the middle of the night with a burning feeling in my

chest and stomach. Then later on came the sharp pain on my ride side by

my hip bone. After a miserablely long ride back, my mom took me to our

family doctor and they told me to go to Childrens Hospital asap. Wow, way

to scare a kid people. I got an ultrasound (which was miserable since they make

you have a full bladder and they push on it the whole time) and they were looking

to see if I had appendicitis. I didn't -THANK YOU GOD.- But they did discover a

cyst I had. While they were pushing on my appendix it ruptured. Luckily, the fluid

was clear so they let me go and I am now in pain for the next week or so. Oh well,

I had a life changing night last night and nothing can bring me down. Not even a

ruptured cyst that hurts like the dickens.

"You Are Here" Jennifer E. Smith

2009-08-22T17:47:00.000-07:00

This book was interesting. It wasn't as much of a romance story as I thought it would be, but it was still pretty good. Emma discovers she had a twin brother who died a few days after birth and she realizes this could be why she feels so lonely in life. Peter is miserable without his mother and just his father who he feels he isn't good enough for. Emma sets off to see her brother's grave and Peter joins her on the road trip. The two get to know each other along the way. I must say my favorite character is the three-legged stray dog they pick up along the way. I have a soft spot for animals and he is the cutest and best of friends. If I had to rate this book, I'd probably give it a 2 1/2 -3 stars (out of 5). Maybe it's just because it interrupted my Nicholas Sparks kick, I don't know. But it was still pretty good, especially since it only took me a day of work to read it.

"The Choice" Nicholas Sparksw

2009-08-21T16:42:00.000-07:00

Nicholas Sparks is, without a doubt, my favorite author. This book, however, has been my favorite of his so far. I absolutely loved this book. It so realistic and I loved this love story. It was written a little different of a format than most of his other books. It was heart-wrenching and tear jerking. It touched my heart and will touch yours too. There are a few unexpected twists that can either end very bad or exceptionally good. Everyone wants and hopes for a fairy tail ending. This book was so amazing that I actually couldn't wait to get to work. Which is weird for me. There's not much else to say about this book other than its a really great romance novel and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

ugaahh

2009-08-17T10:26:00.000-07:00

School. Work.

School. Dr. apt. Work.

School.

School. Work

School.

Work.

Day off!

Then it starts all over again.

Wow.

2009-08-16T06:24:00.001-07:00

It just hit me as I woke up this morning that today is my last day of summer.

(not that my school is that demanding, but its no summer vacation either..)

Of course I'm not quite ready for school. For starters; my printer isn't working

so there goes half of my school work right there. When I found out that I could

graduate after this year-I'd have enough credits-I was excited at first. One less

year of school work. But then I really got to thinking and didn't know if I

actually wanted to. What would I do with my "Senior year". Work? Go

to college a year early? Leave and go live by myself and get a job? Well I

figured this all out thanks to a song. Yes, a song. I now have made all the

decisions to the questions that have been haunting me for the past few

weeks. I know what I want to do with my future. And for that, I started

to cry when I made that realization. Yes, I cried. But that's just the type of

person I am. Accept me. For I now know which way my life is going. (or rather

which way I want it to go.)

Why I had a good day

2009-08-14T13:25:00.001-07:00

+So work is getting better. I'm getting the hang of it and it's getting easier.

+My mom is in a good mood (despite the massive cleaning for our party tomorrow)

+We have our family picnic tomorrow and I'm excited to see my cousin and her baby.

+I get to sleep in tomorrow morning!!

+My sister comes home Sunday

+My dad took me shopping today and bought me a new digital camera-see picture- as an early birthday present.

+I'm one day closer than yesterday to the Jonas Brothers concert!!! (3rd ROW BABY)

+My mom is making all of my favorite foods for tomorrow. Yummy yummy for Jennifer.

+I'm currently watching The O.C. (which is guaranteed for me to be in a good mood)

+TGIF. Which means its the weekend and I don't have to work until Monday night

+PEREZ HILTON RETWEETED TO ME ON TWITTER!!! boo-yah!

I'm excited about other things but I can't remember them at the time

"sTORI Telling" Tori Spelling

2009-08-13T12:19:00.000-07:00

If you enjoy watching Tori & Dean:Home sweet Hollywood on 'Oxygen', then you'll love this book. I thought the show was stupid until I actually sat down and watched it. I loved it! And then I decided to read the book written by Tori Spelling herself. (this is her first of two books). I was interested in reading about her life told from her point of view and her side of the story; apart from what you see on T.V. and read in the tabloids. Tori has seen and done and experienced so much in her life I can now see why she is the person that she is today. She talks about her famous T.V. producer of a father and his spoiled wife who is a not-so-great mother, her acting career and how she got started, her relationships (which make me want to scream at her "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!?!"), and how she met her soulmate and current husband, and having her first child (Liam Aaron McDermott). I enjoyed this book and I am currently waiting for the library to call and let me know that her 2nd book, Mommywood, has arrived for me.

BTW:I'm, ironically, watching Tori & Dean: Home sweet Hollywood as I'm writing this.

Rambling

2009-08-11T16:42:00.001-07:00

Lets see hereeee:

-Heath ledger's quote "Can you put a price on your dreams?" (as heard in Dr. Ingoriums Wonder

Emporium trailer) is sticking in my head right now and I'm pretty sure God has something to do

with this, as in it's a sign for me.

-I have an eye exam tomorrow which I'm really getting stressed/anxious about because I hate

how they dilate the pupils. eeeekk!

-I have to work for the first time by myself for a shift tomorrow. eeeeeekk (again!)& I have to drive to work with dilated pupils (zoinksss)

-My sister is in Michigan for the week with her boyfriend so that's one less week of being with

her before she goes back to college.

-This Saturday is our family picnic that we have each year with my mom's side of the family

and I guess I should be really looking forward to it...but I'm not as excited as I should be.

-I don't really expect anyone to care while reading this, I just wanted to vent and Twitter

only lets me enter 140 characters at a time...annnd I've been tweeting a lot today.

-My school lessons open next Monday (Aug. 17) So that is the start of my school year.

-I go to the JONAS BROTHERS CONCERT in two weeks!! (WED. AUG 26) in Columbus, OH

and as you are probably already aware..I AM SO PUMPED! WOOHOO.

-I've been experiencing random nauseous moments, head aches, blacking out, light headedness, high blood pressure (which is EXTREMELY rare for me.), and fatigue-for the past few weeks

and it's not getting better (YES, I'm complaining. I apologize. You don't have to read this though, that's all YOUR choice)

-I haven't really hung out with my friends in awhile since I started working..and also I don't feel like it too much because of me being weirdly ill (-at times-). And plus is the "end of summer blues"

-I haven't been reading as much as I normally do. Now the only times I read are at work. (which is a lot of free time, but still!) My library holds are all coming in and here I am slacking on my reading.

-I really want to get back into my violin lessons that I took a break from back towards the end

of June. I just don't have time (or the will) to practice..and that makes me disappointed in

myself because it's been a part of my life since I was a little kid (4th grade..thats a ways back)

and I want it to remain a part of my life for a long, long time. *Sighhh*

-Today I had a bad head ache so I didn't go to work and guess what...I'm still sitting in my PJ's

and it's almost 8 o'clock (PM!) I know-bum right?

-The best part of my days (the time I look forward to the absolute most) is at night when I am

lying in my bed trying to fall asleep..but I think by now both me AND MY BRAIN know I don't

want to sleep..I lie there and day dream (well its night time,so night dream) about how I

would love love love love love truly love my life to be. The song affects my mood and the

pictures I see in my head. I guess your life can be considered "unsatisfactory" when you actually

look forward to dreaming. Didn't Dr. Seuss once say "You know your life is great, when you

don't want to go to sleep because reality is better than your dreams." ** (something like that).

Well in this case, it is actually the opposite.

-I live on a one-day-at-a-time basis. I easily get anxious, stressed, worried, concerned, upset

with the future and I can drive myself crazy just thinking about it. (It happens too often)

So thanks for letting me rant. I should be good for awhile now =]

Heath Ledger's last film (trailer)

2009-08-11T15:17:00.000-07:00

http://perezhilton.com/2009-08-11-first-trailer-of-heath-ledgers-last-film

I saw this on Perez's website and it made me sentimental.

God bless Heath Ledger (Rest in peace). & his family and friends

as well.

*I can't wait for this movie to come out. I really want to see the

last production project of Heath Ledger. He was (and will always

be)my favorite actor of all time.

I admire Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell for stepping

in once Heath Ledger passed. God bless you three as well.

"are u 4 real?" Sara Kadefors

2009-08-07T14:51:00.000-07:00

It took me three days to read this book. (and I only read it during my free time at work..) It was definately a novel about teen romance. Two people from different places, with different lives meet in a chat room one night while they're both feeling upset. They take comfort in becoming virtual friends. They meet in real life. Of course every friendship has its own bumps in the roads. I wasn't sure how to book was going to end as I was reading at that point. All I knew was how I wanted it to end. I'm a sucker for sappy, honky-dory, happily ever after-type endings. I recommend this book if you are bored and want just a story to read about teens finding themselves and finding each other. There's not really much else to say.

Warning

2009-08-07T06:41:00.001-07:00

I'm just gonna put this out there, but for those of you

who don't have a job...keep it that way. Jobs suckk

soo baddd. Yes,this blog is just going to be me complaining

about having a job. You literally sit there staring at the

clock thinking "move faster move faster" and you

actually WANT to go home..no matter how bad you

hate it there. :\ You go to bed at night thinking "uggg I

have to work tomorrow". Then you wake up in the morning

all happy and honky dory and then you remember "UGG I

have to work today!" I find myself wishing someone would

invent a 'Fast Forward' button for my life; just so I can

fast forward through the hours I work. Sure you get paid, but

when it all comes down to it, you just want to remain a kid

at heart for as long as you possibly can. So if you don't have a

job-REJOICE.

"The Chosen One" Carol Lynch Williams

2009-08-04T18:52:00.000-07:00

"The Chosen One" is a novel that has a very different style apart from all the other books I've read in my life. I did, however, find it intriguing. It was pretty good to be set in a different type of lifestyle. It's the culture where they assign people who they marry. Young teens must marry older men. And those men must have at least three wives to go to heaven (or so they believe). Thirteen year old Kyra must marry her 60 year old uncle. Yet, she is in love with a young boy her age. It is against the Prophet to see him, however. They sneak out when it's dark. The boy, Joshua, tries to set it up so that he can Choose her and be her husband. The Prophet does not agree to this and Joshua is forced to flee leaving Kyra behind with only his promise to come back for her. Kyra has no choice but to leave, or marry her uncle. Reading this makes me grateful for our country giving us choices and guaranteed freedoms and rights.

e.E. Charlton Trujillo

2009-08-04T14:57:00.000-07:00

e.E. Charlton Trujillo (AKA Unis) is the director of the (*hopefully* soon to be) T.V. drama "Fallen".

After working with her in her latest production in July 2009 I decided to read her two published books. They are short, yet full of emotions. They have similarities although she wrote them as separate stories. Unis is from Texas, therefore the stories take place in Texas. As I was reading these books, I couldn't believe the woman I had just worked with (and throughout the long filming days-randomly chatting with) had written these stories! It's truly amazing to know someone then read their work. I loved these books and I really think you guys would too.

"If the Witness Lied" Caroline B. Cooney

2009-08-04T14:42:00.000-07:00

This book has an antagonist from Hell. I have never wanted to be inside a story, just so I can personally strangle the bad person myself. I kid you not. This book shows the true bonds of family love. Siblings must stick together to conquer their one and true enemy. Of course they're just kids trying to get through life after their parents died. Their mother was developing cancer while pregnant with the youngest sibling, Tris. The kemotherapy would kill her baby so she made the selfless decision to let the cancer take its course just so her baby can live. However, at the age of 2, Tris is said to have accidentally released the emergency brake in his father's jeep (while his father was searching for something underneath it), ending up killing his own father as well. -OR- did the one and only witness lie about the "accident"? Is she out to ruin their lives? Yes she is. I loved reading the bonds of these three children trying to survive these tough times when no one will listen to them. This is a short book that takes no time at all to read. I loved it and it made me go and hug my brother and sister once I finished it.

"The Lucky One" :Nicholas Sparks

2009-08-04T14:36:00.000-07:00

On a rainy day what else is there to do but read? I read Nicholas Sparks' "The Lucky One", and just like all of his other novels, I thoroughly enjoyed it. I was sad to come to the end because I fell in love with the characters. It's extra easy to take sides with the good people in this book. There is no contest. The antagonist does tend to make you want to throw the book at the wall, but the ending is truly satisfying. The climax was in an unusual place-it was at the end of the book. The whole story ending and conclusion to events is in the last 5-10 pages. I have loved EVERY novel by Nicholas Sparks. Truly inspirational.

weekend away

2009-08-02T16:36:00.001-07:00

It was so nice to go to a different town and get away.

It was well overdue. Unfortunately, the missionaries came

while I was away and my mom got the pleasure of telling

them how much of a handful I am, and how childish I am,

and how I have no sense of mind, @#$%&^*. My brother

was the one who informed me of that...because my mom

won't even talk to me. I texted her Friday on my way to

Indianapolis and told her about the situation thinking

she'd forget about it by the time we got back. WRONG.

she called and was nOT HAPPY WHATSOEVER. And now

as I am back home, she is still not happy with me. And by

not happy I mean FURIOUS. sdgkjndafnadfjgh What am

I going to do? My goal for this week is to spend as little

time at home as possible. Give her time to cool off. yeah.

Oh good Lord

2009-07-29T18:14:00.000-07:00

I saw this commercial to get a free Bible so I went to

the website to request one. After typing in all of

my information and requesting my free Bible, a notice

pops up and says missionaries will arrive in a few days.

HOLY GOD. I'd like the free Bible and all, thats great!

But missionaries en mi casa? THEY DIDN'T SAY THAT

ON THE COMMERCIAL OR BEFORE I ENTERED MY

ADDRESS AND AGE AND ALL. Can I sue this company

for sending strangers to my house? I know that'd be a sin

to sue a religious, non-profit organization...but they should

warn you that they're sending friggen missionaries to your

house! Remind me to tell my mom not to answer the door

when they come in the next few days. Good lord.

Don't request a Bible through Mormon something

or other. They'll send missionaries to your house.

(it's kind of like soliciting)

What to do?

2009-07-26T11:07:00.000-07:00

Last night I had a dream and I KNOW it was from God.

It has to do with my future. I know I can take care of

myself. There are different possibilities as to where I

will take myself in life. I know where I want to go,

what I want to do, and who I want to be...I just don't

know how to get there. I know it will be hard and it

will take a lot of work and dedication and tough skin.

I can handle all of that. What I can't handle is making

the actual decision. I wish I knew how the future would

turn out depending on which way I choose to go. I know

I'm supposed to live in the moment. But what I do know

affects me later on. I need a guardian angel now more

than ever.

You may not know that:

2009-07-25T16:14:00.000-07:00

-My confirmation name is Elizabeth.

-I have a cat named Fritzi and I've had her since 2nd grade.

-I got my first puppy last Christmas, and her name is Muffy-she's a shih-poo.

-I've been playing violin since 4th grade.

-My favorite vacation place is Disney World.

-When I turn 18 I am skipping college and moving to L.A. to start my own life.(say what you want)

-I have a soft spot for animals.

-I want to name my kids: Adam Joseph, Brody Adam (I know I used Adam twice) and either have a Noah and a Natalie (just to throw those in there as well)

-My favorite band is the Jonas Brothers

-I've had 7 or 8 different journals/diaries in the past.

-My favorite number is 9 because that is my favorite NASCAR driver's no. (Kasey Kahne!)

-My sister's dog was a stray that we saved and was named after Kasey Kahne.

-I also have 2 cats (Chloe & Pumpkin) and two other dogs not yet mentioned (Blackie & Bella)

-I want a new car (BMW X3)

-I wish I lived in CA;near a beach, with palm trees, sunny year round, and a place for my dreams.

-I am a tad bit materialistic, but it is mostly for myself.

-I do try to sing (if you watch my YouTube)

-I really enjoy meeting new people.

-I tend to lean more towards dark haired guys.(its just a majority I've noticed from the past)

-I like dying my hair different colors to see which I like best.

-My current obsession is Smoothie King.

-I have a crush on Harry Potter.

-I've seen every single episode of 'The OC'

-My all time favorite book is 'The Alchemist"

-I have read the 'Twilight' series 6 times.

-I love being filmed/photographed (which is good for my career choice)

-I prefer talking on the phone to texting.

-I have a bah habit of picking the split ends of my hair.

-I have a Mac laptop;which I am on way too much.

-I want to meet Rachel Bilson some day.

-One of my goals is to meet Jenny Craig before I die.

-I'm a republican.(although they tell me I'm not supposed to tell anyone..)

-I read a lot, I really love it!

-I'm a perfectionist.

-I am dyslexic.

-I have a muscle disease called fibromyalgia.

-I am an undiagnosed insomniac.

-I eat/write with my right hand but do everything else with my left.

-My favorite exercise is biking.

-I read the bible.

-I love the park.

-I love to bake. (my mom calls me Betty Crocker)

-I want to live in England for a while later in my life.

-I want to raise my kids to have english accents (see above^)

-I often think about the future. (yes, it scares me to death)

-My current favorite thing to do when I'm bored is making lists on my blog

I saw God today

2009-07-25T12:25:00.000-07:00

So my mom got me a credit card to use for gas and "emergencies."

She let me keep it with me this past week just because it was more

convenient. Well, yesterday after getting my extensions taken out

(YES I DID IT!), My sister and I went to the mall to get Smoothie King.

Then we were walking through stores just looking and at 'Express' I saw

this super cool purse that was $60 and I thought "I can find a cheaper one".

We go through 'New York & Co.' And I see cute purses for $30-$40.Even

better! I said "lets go to Macy's and come back if I don't find anything"

Wellllll...Macy's had Dooney & Burkes and JEnnifer is helpless when

she is put in the same room as designer greatness. So my plastic beauty

paid for my GORGEOUS new Dooney & Burke purse. I was happy but

had that guilty feeling. When I got home my mom went BALISITIC .

As crazy as a mother can get when her daughter spends more money

than she could on her credit card for emergencies only. She gave me

the whole "you don't have a job, you can't support yourself, you know

darn well you shouldn't have spent this much money on just a purse!"

Yeah I don't have a job, but this is where the point of my story is:

I decided I should get a nice little job to pay for my own things and

to save up for when I move out on my own and for school/college/things

like that. Weellll God being the great Lord that he is intervened and I

didn't realize it at first.

Jo Hirlinger wrote on my wall on facebook offering me a job at

her dad's carlot. HOW EASSY IS THAT!? answer phones, 3 hours a night

a few times a week. And the pay is great! That night when I was saying

my prayers and falling asleep, it HIT ME! THE HEAVENLY FATHER I

HOLD FAITH IN WAS THE REASON FOR ALL THIS.

bottom line: I saw God today.

Good parts of life

2009-07-23T09:14:00.000-07:00

-Rain at nighttime.

-Laughing until your stomach hurts.

-Finishing a good book.

-Driving with the windows down on a sunny day.

-Laying by the pool, getting warmed by the sun.

-Escalators.

-Smoothie King.

-My mom bringing me starbucks in the morning.

-My puppy sleeping next to me.

-Getting lost in music.

-Discovering something new about the world.

-Staying up late at night watching scary shows on t.v.

-Talking to that one guy who gives you butterflies in your stomach.

-Confiding in a close friend.

-Watching Jim Gaffigan on YouTube.

-Twitter.

-Wipeout (Wed. @ 8PM on ABC)

-That 70's show marathons.

-Flying in an airplane.

-Road trips.

-Taking a nap in the middle of the day.

-Sitting at the park.

-Capturing nature's true beauty.

-Reading the Bible.

-Looking at old pictures.

-Blogging.

-Pedicures.

-Sleeping through breakfast.

-Roller coasters.

-Talking on the phone for a long time.

-Buying new sunglasses.

-Bon fires.

-Spending time with momma.

-Drinking ice cold water when you're really hot.

-Knowing you have no school work during summer.

Belittled

2009-07-22T13:27:00.000-07:00

Maybe I've been wrong all along.

Maybe I've been living in a fantasy.

Maybe I've failed to see what's right in front of me.

Maybe I've thought too positively.

Maybe I overlooked the small, yet true facts.

Maybe I was too hopeful.

Maybe I haven't been praying hard enough.

Maybe God can't hear me.

Maybe reality is stronger than any dream.

Maybe I set my goals too high.

Maybe I've been too busy dreaming it, not doing it.

Maybe all my dreams will come crushing down.

MAYBE MY MOM IS RIGHT.

Here we go again

2009-07-21T08:48:00.001-07:00

What's that saying; Old habits die hard, is that it?

Yeah well if thats it BOY IS IT TRUE. good lord.

I feel like I'm part of the water cycle here.

And the part where I do the habit, yeah that's

precipitation. Then picking myself up and putting

me back together is evaporation. Trying my absolute

hardest to attempt in keeping my changed ways

is condensation and then my mind wins and that

means: when it rains IT POURS. Oh Lord.

I'm just gonna vent here

2009-07-20T14:33:00.000-07:00

!@#$%^*($$@ l

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good lord!! I get so maddd at myself when these things

happen. like GOSH JENNIFER don't give in. be mean

not nice. Don't let people take advantage of you. I swear

on my life its so annoying and frustrating. (DONT WORRY

I'LL EXPLAIN WHAT HAPPENED) It just bugs me that

people only want to do "acting" so they can be rich, or

famous, or meet famous people and what not. GODDDD!

It makes me so mad and frustrated.

So here's the story:

This girl (yes I know her but haven't talked to her since

7th grade) messages me on facebook saying "Do you know

any good agents/websites/locations that are for acting. I want

to get into acting but I don't know EXACTLY how."

DUMB DUMB DUMB. this is the number one way to make me

so frustrated and mad. Like for real!?!?!?!!?

1)it's NOT THAT HARD. EVER HEARD OF GOOGLE!?!

2)We haven't talked in forever you're just using me.

WHY THE HECK DID I REPLY?!?

she doesn't want to do acting. It's not a passion she has.

She wouldn't tolerate the long days, the demanding rehearsals,

the cruelty and rejection of the industry. I KNOW I KNOW IKNOW!

SHE just wants to be famous. She just wants to brag to her friends.

She just wants to say "I live in Hollywood, I do acting, I'm rich,

I know famous people." GAHHHH AMETUER.! (i know its spelt

wrong.) I DONT CARE.

I have put so much into this just to get where I am (which isn't too far).

My parents spent boocoo bucks on acting lessons I've been taking for

a year. 18 HOURS A WEEKEND! I leaarn the businesss and I enjoy it

because it is what I truly love. I left high school so it wouldn't hold me

back from auditions. and guess what I WAS RIGHT AND MADE A GOOD

DECISION WITH THAT. OR ELSE I WOULDNT HAVE AN AGENT OR

HAVE GONE TO ALL THOSE AUDITIONS. OR HAVE GONE TO THOSE

PHOTOSHOOTS TO GET MY HEADSHOTS AND PICTURES TO SEND OUT.

I'm more than dedicated to this. (not that other actors aren't, I'm sure they

can empathize with me) BUT WHY THE HECK DID I REPLY TO HER!?

I SHOULDN'T HAVE SHOULDN'T HAVE SHOULDN'T HAVE! DANGIT!

IT JUST MAKES ME SO MAD. I DEDICATE SO MUCH WORK INTO THIS.

EVERY DAY I PRACTICE EVERY OTHER MONOLOGUE I HAVE MEMORIZED.

YES I HAVE 6 MONOLOGUES MEMORIZED FOR AUDITIONS. this girl

doesn't even know what a monologue is I KID YOU NOT!!. it just makes me

so mad she all of a sudden decides she's going to ask JENNIFER ON FACEBOOK

HOW TO DO ACTING BECAUSE SHE WOULD LOOK SO COOL TO EVERYONE

I'm really sorry for this but I really really really needed to vent. I didn't

really expect anyone to care or read the whole thing. but I didn't want to

go punch a wall or anything (no, I don't need anger management [: thanks)

DOES ANYONE ELSE AGREE WITH ME THOUGH?!?!?!??!

Blast from the past

2009-07-19T15:48:00.000-07:00

Today's "Blast from the Past" is featuring:

WHO? : Brandie Potzick

WHERE? : Washington D.C. (as seen in pic.)

WHEN? : 8th grade. (May 2007)

WHY? : Brandie & I went to Panera today and caught up and reminisced and talked of old times. I decided this picture fitted in perfectly with my life as of this day.

Necessito sus opinones

2009-07-16T08:35:00.001-07:00

Sooo, next Friday I have a hair apt to get my extensions moved up

(they're on little beads and as my hair grows out, every so many weeks

I go back and get them moved back up). I've had extensions since

February. I'm thinking it's time for a change. I know my mom put a lot

of money into these but I think I'm ready to part with them. I'm torn

because I feel like they're a big part of my looks and I need them with

my career. (now, how logical or illogical that sounds, I'm not so sure.)

But here's why I want them out:

-They're heavy, especially when I put my hair up. It slides out and hurts

after awhile.

-I feel like I can't do much with them except wavy or straight.

-I can't pull my hair up/back certain ways because you will see the

beads they are on.

-My hair is actually only about 2 inches shorter than the actual extensions

now so its almost as long as them. therefore extensions are pointless now.

-It's just time for a change.

-Time to go back to all natural.

TELL ME YOUR OPINION PLEASEEEE.

I miss my friend..

2009-07-13T10:13:00.000-07:00

Let's call this friend Rock. (so you don't know if its a boy or girl, but by the way I talk about Rock, you'll probably be able to figure it out.) It all started in the beginning of 6th grade. I thought Rock was so cool and I really wanted to be Rock's friend. And in 6th grade Rock was in my class so we grew to be very close friends. Rock would come over to my house and we'd have sleepovers and have so much fun. (you probably just figured out Rock's gender...told you.) Anywho, Rock introduced me to cheerleading and we were so so close. We both made the cheerleading squad in 7th grade and that made me feel even closer and more appreciative of Rock. Rock had introduced me to this new passion I had no idea I had or even held talent for. Sure we had a few ups and downs but which close friends don't? Yeah. So anyways, in Jr. High, Rock and I were still friends through cheerleading but we had aquired new friends and different cliques, and circles, to hang around. Of course that was okay. I felt like I could lean onto Rock because Rock was going through some rough things but I looked up to Rock as a solid figure. Once high school came around, we were still friends through cheerleading and even had a class or two together so we still chatted. Then sophomore year we had no classes, no cheerleading, nothing to keep our friendship together. Of course we still said Hi in the hallways and smiled at eachother and talked if we saw eachother after school at friends' lockers, but other than that, Rock and I had lost touch. Then I left school and we only talked virtually and not even real concersations.

Last night I had a dream about Rock, and we were at this weird camp (I'm not sure where, but that's how dreams go.) and I loved that we were really close and really great friends again. It made me miss the days in the past when we were so close. I'm not sure if Rock will read this or not, and even if Rock does, I don't know if they will realize this is directed towards them. Rock you are still in my heart. You will always be. I will always desire your friendship and cherish the amazing moments we had. I love you Rock ,and I always will.

I miss my Rock.

Pumpkin after Catnip consumption

2009-07-12T13:44:00.000-07:00

New experience

2009-07-10T18:43:00.000-07:00

Am I nervous? OF COURSE

Am I excited? ABSOLUTELY

Am I anxious? A LITTLE BIT

Am I ready? AS MUCH AS I'LL EVER BE

Am I prepared? PROBABLY NOT AS MUCH AS I SHOULD

Am I certain? AM I EVER..?

Am I wishful? EVERYDAY

Am I thinking positively? WITH EVERY THOUGHT

Am I worried? I'LL LEAVE THAT TO MY MOM

Am I hopeful? ALWAYS

Am I holding steady? I'VE NEVER BEEN STEADY

Am I new to this? 100% !!!!!

DO I HOLD FAITH IN THE LORD? EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY

"Dont wanna be torn"

2009-07-10T15:37:00.000-07:00

I have a decision to make. It is completely my choice. No one can answer

this for me. It's all on me. So do I say 'Yes' or answer with a firm 'No'...

I wish there was a sign. Something to show me what the right choice

would be. I've considered all of the possibilities of both outcomes.

The negatives aren't enough to overrule the positives. However, I

don't want to regret this. Whether its sooner or later. Regret is what

I am trying to avoid. I know the quote "don't regret anything because

at one point it was what you really wanted." I just don't have

enough faith in myself to make the right choice with nothing bad to follow.

*I found this song. And it says it all. Listen to your heart.*

Maybe its the things I say
Maybe I should think before I speak
But I thought I knew enough to know myself
And do whats right for me

And these walls I'm building now
You used to bring them down
The tears I'm crying out
You used to wipe away

I thought you said it was easy
Listenin' to your heart
I thought you said I'd be ok
So why am I breaking apart?
Don't wanna be torn

Maybe I should choose
Between what I want
And what you think I need

Cause I'll always be your little girl
But even little girls have got to dream
Now it all feels like a fight
You were always on my side
All I need now
Is to make it go away

I thought you said it was easy
Listenin' to your heart
I thought you said I'd be ok
So why am I breaking apart?
Don't wanna be torn

Why is all this so confusing?
Complicated and consuming
Why does all this make me angry?
Wanna go back to being happy

Cause here I'm crying now
Trying to walk away

I thought you said it was easy
Listenin' to your heart
I thought you said I'd be ok
So why am I breaking apart?
Don't wanna be torn

So far so great

2009-07-08T15:22:00.000-07:00

Off to the races
I'm going places
Might be a long shot
Not gonna waste it
This is the big break
And it's calling my name
Yeeeaah

So far so great, get with it
At least that's how I see it
Having a dream's just the beginning
So far so great, believe it
Can’t take away this feeling
Taking a ride with chance to my side
Yeah, I can't wait
So far, so great

Might need to wing it
Still gonna bring it
Not gonna sink low
I'm going swimming
Swing for the fences
Sky's not the limit today
Yeeeaah

So far so great, get with it
At least that's how I see it
Having a dream's just the beginning
So far so great, believe it
Can’t take away this feeling
Taking a ride with chance to my side
Yeah, I can't wait
So far, so great

Everyone says don't get your hopes up
Learn the ropes and climb the ladder
I know in the end that just being here is the best
And it only gets better, it only gets better

So far so great, get with it
At least that's how I see it
Having a dream's just the beginning
So far so great, believe it
Can’t take away this feeling
Taking a ride with chance to my side
Yeah, I can't wait
So far, so great
I can't wait
So far so great

Filming schedule

2009-07-08T11:22:00.000-07:00

Pre-shoot

Wed(7/8):Final wardrobe fitting @6PM

Thurs(7/9):Meeting with crew @5PM

Filming days/times:

Sat(7/11):8AM-7PM

Sun(7/12):8AM-6PM

Mon(7/13):11AM-8:45PM

Tues(7/14):7PM-11:30PM

Wed(7/15):6:30PM-10:30PM

Thur(7/16):2PM-6PM

Fri(7/17):7PM-12AM

Sat(7/18):6PM-1AM

Employed!

2009-07-06T18:35:00.001-07:00

So today my sister, brother and his friend, and I went to Kings Island

today and it was a blast (although I was there just Thursday with Marci,

Jacbob, and Tim). However the most exciting part was the carride back.

My mom called and asked where we were. I told her we were on our way

home and would be there soon.

Her reply: "Okay, I've got something important

to tell you.

Me:"Tell me now."

Her:"I can't I'll start to cry again."

(Of course I make her tell me right then and there if it's that

important and emotional.)

Turns out:

I GOT THE PART FOR THE PRODUCTION I AUDITIONED FOR THE

A FEW WEEKS AGO.HOLY EFFING MOLY THIS IS A DREAM COME TRUE!

All I have to say is:Thank you Lord God. I couldn't have done this without you.

You work miracles in ways that I can never detect. But I have faith. I had faith

all along this journey. And as this journey carries on I will continue to hold

my faith in you and all my trust and love. Thank you Lord, for EVERYTHING.

"Identical" Ellen Hopkins

2009-07-06T18:29:00.000-07:00

This book was incredibly insightful. One word I would use to describe it: EYE OPENING! It's about two twin sisters who struggle with a mother who doesn't care anymore and a father who is abusive (with drugs/alcohol, and sexually). They hide all of their problems from the world. After an accident, their family was never the same. The mom was rarely home and the father was extremely controlling and as you can see, very messed up with life. They have to put on pretty smiling faces to the public because their mom is in politics so everyone knows who they are. The ending was what you would call 'unexpected'! If you ever saw the movie The Uninvited, the endings in that and in this novel are kind of similar in a way or so. I did not see it coming at all! I must say this book was very dear to the heart. I love the way Ellen Hopkins wrote it. I am definately going to read her other books as well!

FAVORITE QUOTE:

"You are my glue. Without you, I'd be nothing but broken pieces."

'Miles to Go' Miley Cyrus

2009-07-05T17:00:00.000-07:00

This book was exceptionally good. I think it was so so so soooo inspirational. She really explains her life story well. I admit that I was a little bias against her from what I heard through the media. However, the way she explains things in her book clears things up and tells what truly was going on in her life. And of course, she would know best. I would find amazing quotes throughout the memoir and I wrote my favorite ones down. I honestly think you should go get a copy and read it because it is so inspirational and true to the heart. By the end, I didn't want it to be over.

"You realize you have one life-and you have to live fully for the moments you have. There can't be room for nerves."

"Beauty is the enemy. We try to conquer not feeling beautiful all our lives. It's a battle that can't be won. There's no definition of beauty. The only way to achieve beauty is to feel it from inside without breaking it down into physical attributes."

"The biggest moments of insecurity come when all self confidence is lost and you feel like people are watching and judging. It should be the opposite. You should feel like the people who are watching care about you. This is something we can try to give each other-the feeling that eyes signal support, not disdain."

"Embarrassment is the worst. Its the feeling of having your entire body go numb and not knowing what to do with yourself for that one moment. There's no solution to embarrassment. It happens and you just have to put it behind you."

"Fear is the only obstacle that gets in the way of doing what we love. People are scared to travel, to try new things, to follow their dreams. Fear holds us back from living the lives we were made to live."

"Success is the progressive realization of worthy ideas or goals." -Billy Ray Cyrus

"Well don't be scared of anything. People waste their lives being scared. Lasso the moon. But don't do it because someone tells you its the right idea." -Cyndi Lauper

"Faith is having the strength to trust in something that you can't see with your eyes or prove scientifically. You believe because your heart tells you that's where you should go or who you should be. Your heart tells you what is right."

"If there's one message I have for my fans, it's that you can make your dreams real, but you have to enjoy just being. Make the best of the life you have every day. I can't wait to see what's in the days ahead, but I also don't want to fill them up too fast."

f_ _ _mylife

2009-07-05T16:46:00.000-07:00

So this afternoon my mom and I get in an argument

and I decide that it's best for me to leave the house

instead of just lying in my room, sobbing my eyes out.

So I got to the park and bike the 8 mile in record time

(30 minutes). I had suglasses on but I'm pretty sure some

people could still tell I was crying because they would look

at me weird; and I think one lady tried talking to me but

I head headphones in so I couldn't hear. I just kept on

biking. I sat on a bench for, Oh I don't know, half an hour?

I decided to stay out as long as I could. I went up to the

really big hill and sat on a bench there for awhile until some

creepy old guy walking smiled his creepy smile and waved at me,

then I took off faster than you could say RAPEEEEE. I might

just be paranoid, but he wasn't a cute old guy, he was creepy.

I cruised around for a bit realizing I honestly had no where

to go. (and not just because the library was closed. I wouldn't

have gone there anyway because I was a mess and couldn't

pull myself together.) But I decided to come home. Thinking

my mom would be all mad and upset I was gone for so long

and stormed out the way I did, turns out she wasn't even home.

She left shortly after I did to do grocery shopping with my sister.

Psshhh. Me wasting time trying to worry her that I'm gone for

2 hours when she knows I'm never at the park more than 45 minutes.

Oh well, I plan on being locked in my room all tonight and tomorrow.

Except when I sneak out to pee. And when my laptop dies I'll have

to get the charger too.

This is what it's come to (I'm a nerd) akabookworm

2009-07-03T14:04:00.000-07:00

My blogs have become laaaaame. this is probably the

most weirdest and most pointless blog you will ever

read. It's my reading list.

-"Miles To Go" Miley Cyrus

-"Identical" ***

-"P.S. I love you" ***

-"True Believer" Nicholas Sparks

***-I don't remember the author off of the top of my

head and I don't really feel like going to look at the

books to determine the author. But if you're really

interested in knowing who the author is I will

gladly find out JUST FOR YOU..quite possibly anyways.

Love this song

2009-07-01T10:51:00.001-07:00

I'm counting the days since i began to live without you
I'm covered in rain but it feels just like it's the sun
And it don't get me down, don't come around
You're better off leaving town
I'm partying from now on without you

Hey!
I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better alone
Hey!
I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better,
better off without you

You're stuck in a world and make believe that I can see it
I gave it a chance, she must be crazy not to leave
You're never gonna bring me down,
don't come around
You're better off leaving town
I'm partying from now on without you

Hey!
I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better alone
Hey!
I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better, better off without you

Giving it up, now you're taking away
All of the time, now get out of my way
Never been lost in anyone, it's me they want
Without you I'm insane
So hear me now, screaming out your name

Hey!
I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better alone
Hey!
I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better, better off without you

Better off without you
Cause I'm better off without you

I'm screaming at you
Hey!
Don't care enough to write you a letter now that I'm doing better, better off without you

All in all

2009-06-30T18:03:00.000-07:00

To sum my week up, I've been getting pretty down on myself.

I don't know why I'm so hard on myself at times. I've never

thought of myself as a 'perfectionist' per say..but there has to

be some OCD thing going on here. I feel that I have to bend

over backwards to even try to please myself. Call me crazy

but I'm pretty sure that's not healthy. Say I go to an audition

and I don't get praised for my work then I go home and beat

myself up for not doing better, or giving it my all, or not being

more upbeat and personable and delivering whatever monologue

or scene or script reading I did. I guess I just really, really, REALLY,

hate it here in Ohio. I know that my dreams won't become a reality

here..but it's not like I can control where I live...yet. It seems to be

all I think about these days:what I want from life, what I want to

do with my life, where I want to be, who I want to associate with,

who I want to involve myself with, who I want to be friends with,

who I don't want to be friends with, what I do day in and day out,

where I want to live, the exact location of where I want to live my

life. I won't say exactly, but I'm just going to put this out there:

it's not here.

Quote of my life

2009-06-30T17:58:00.000-07:00

The dreams that you hold for your future are what you

dream about at night. They're always at the back of

your mind. They're what your heart desires. They keep

you going. Accept reality and have a backup plan, but

always follow your dreams no matter what.

Miley Cyrus "Miles to go"

Dream big

2009-06-30T15:26:00.001-07:00

Torture

2009-06-30T15:11:00.000-07:00

I have a passion burning inside of me.

It's always in the back of my mind.

It's always there in my dreams.

Every breath I take, it fills me

with desire. Every step I take

is one step closer to either extreme

hope and achievement or severe

disappointment. Every thought that

passes through my head is tied to it.

All the songs I hear, every note I sing.

Every word that escapes my lips is

spoken upon my dream. Every prayer

I say. Every night I spend lying awake

just thinking about how great my life

would be. How set I would be for the future.

How I am more than ready for this change.

I will do anything it takes. I will go anywhere

I must. To achieve my dreams I would go

to the ends of the Earth, the most extremes

of the universe. I look deep into my heart and

I can feel it beating with this burning desire

to act.

Linsay Lohan- down the tubes

2009-06-28T16:00:00.001-07:00

http://perezhilton.com/2009-06-28-do-you-like-my-sexy-body

^The article tells all.

Current obsessive song

2009-06-28T11:47:00.000-07:00

P.Y.T (Pretty young Thing)

-MICHAEL JACKSON

**With all of the radio stations playing his songs in memory of

him, I have become re-obsessed with P.Y.T. <3

Where Did You Come From Lady
And Ooh Won't You Take Me There
Right Away Won't You Baby
Tendoroni You've Got To Be
Spark My Nature
Sugar Fly With Me
Don't You Know Now
Is The Perfect Time
We Can Make It Right
Hit The City Lights
Then Tonight Ease The Lovin' Pain
Let Me Take You To The Max

I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)
Pretty Young Thing
You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)
Tender Lovin' Care
And I'll Take You There
I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)
Pretty Young Thing
You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)
Tender Lovin' Care
I'll Shake You There

Anywhere You Wanna Go

Nothin' Can Stop This Burnin'
Desire To Be With You
Gotta Get To You Baby
Won't You Come, It's Emergency
Cool My Fire Yearnin'
Honey, Come Set Me Free
Don't You Know Now Is The Perfect Time
We Can Dim The Lights
Just To Make It Right
In The Night
Hit The Lovin' Spot
I'll Give You All That I've Got

I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)
Pretty Young Thing
You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)
Tender Lovin' Care
And I'll Take You There
I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)
Pretty Young Thing
You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)
Tender Lovin' Care
I'll Take You There

Breakdown
Pretty Young Things, Repeat After Me
[Michael] I Said Na Na Na
[P.Y.T.'S] Na Na Na
[Michael] Na Na Na Na
[P.Y.T.'S] Na Na Na Na
[Michael] Na Na Na
[P.Y.T.'S] Na Na Na
[Michael] I Said Na Na Na Na Na
[P.Y.T.'S] Na Na Na Na Na
[Michael] I'll Take You There

I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)
Pretty Young Thing
You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)
Tender Lovin' Care
And I'll Take You There
I Want To Love You (P.Y.T.)
Pretty Young Thing
You Need Some Lovin' (T.L.C.)
Tender Lovin' Care
I'll Take You There

Holy crap-RIP Billy Mays

2009-06-28T10:53:00.000-07:00

IMPORTANT:

**Billy Mays was found dead in his home in Florida

Sunday (today) June 28.

This has to be a week in history.

1)Ed McMahon

2)Farrah Fawcett

3)Michael Jackson

& now 4) Billy Mays

Read Article here:

http://perezhilton.com/2009-06-28-rip-278

CPDRC "Thriller" dance routine

2009-06-27T13:37:00.000-07:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMnk7lh9M3o

1,500 plus CPDRC inmates of the Cebu Provincial

Detention and Rehabilitation Center,

Cebu, Philippines at practice! This is not the final routine,

and definitely not a punishment! just a teaser

R.I.P MJ

2009-06-25T15:05:00.000-07:00

According to Perez Hilton and TMZ:

Michael Jackson has passed away from

cardiac arrest. No no no no no!! How

can this happen?! Farrah Fawcett died

this morning and now Michael Jackson

this evening? Sad, sad, sad, :\

Rest In Peace MJ.

-You as well Miss Fawcett

Inspiring song

2009-06-23T18:31:00.001-07:00

"Before the Storm"

-Jonas Brothers Feat. Miley Cyrus

***I don't know if anyone even reads the lyrics all the way through

or even at all but every song I put on here isn't just because I like

it, it's because the lyrics are meaningful and inspirational. They help

me and not only do I listen to the songs, I read the lyrics...especially

when I'm going through a rough time or need some spirit lifting.

I know this isn't what I wanted,
I never thought it come this far,
Just thinking back to where we started,
And how we lost all that we are.
We were young and times were easy.
But I could see it's not the same.
I'm standing here but you don't see me,
I'd give it all for that to change.
But I don't want to lose her,
Don't wanna let her go.
Standin' out in the rain,
Need to know if it's over,
'Cuz I will leave you alone.
I'm flooded with all this pain,
Knowing I'll never hold her
Like I did
Before the storm
(Yeah, before the storm)
With every strike of lightning,
Comes a memory that lasts.
And not a word is left unspoken,
As the thunder starts to crash.
Maybe I
Should give up.
Standin' out in the rain,
Need to know if it's over,
'Cuz I will leave you alone.
I'm flooded with all this pain,
Knowing I'll never hold her
Like I did
Before the storm
Trying to keep
The lights from going out
And the clouds from ripping out my broken heart.
They always say,
That a heart is not a home
Without the one who gets you through the storm.
Standin' out in the rain,
Knowin' that it's really over.
Please don't leave me alone.
I'm flooded with all this pain,
Knowing I'll never hold ya,
Like I did,
Before the storm.
(The storm)
Like I did
Before the storm

Offically diagosed with Blogging addiction

2009-06-23T15:22:00.000-07:00

For all of you who said blogging becomes addicting...you were right!

I have officially become a blogging addict. I kid you not. I find myself

thinking about things to blog about and spending more time on here

than on any other website. (welllll..it's kinda tied with TWITTER)

just because twitter is equally as addicting. But the more blog

followers I have the more I feel I need to post on here..and as

of now I only have 6 followers ..which is actually quite pathetic

but ...yeah. Anywho I hope everyone else on here is just as

pathetically addicted as I am so that I'm not alone.. :)

PicShare

2009-06-23T15:18:00.001-07:00

I decided to share this picture with all of you,

It was Sammi, Marci, and Casey's last day of school and after their exams we went to greendale to see 'Drag Me to Hell'.

Yeah, it was kinda scary. But there were only 2 other people in the theatre. And this picture was on Casey's camera

so of course I didn't find it until today (3 weeks later..) haha but oh well. Atleast I found it!

P.S. I only look really pale because I

was taking the picture and I

was right by the flash..just so

you all know.

2009-06-23T13:04:00.000-07:00

http://perezhilton.com/2009-06-23-joe-jonas-takes-swipe-at-taylor

HAHAH this is a link to Perez Hilton's website where

he has an article about Joe Jonas at his concert and changes

the lyrics in the Jonas song "Much Better" from 'now I'm

done with super stars'...to 'now I'm done with COUNTRY

stars'. This was him taking a stab at Taylor Swift. HAHAH!

Watch around 0:10 or a little after to watch Nick's reaction.

He sits down and laughs REAL big. and you can see it.

Discovery

2009-06-22T18:07:00.001-07:00

I got these from Jojo's facebook! I totally forgot about them :)

Laaaame

2009-06-22T10:52:00.000-07:00

Ohio+weather=SUCKS!

sorry for the language but

forreal. It's june and summer

and I would like to swim and

get a nice golden, brown tan

and look like I came from

Hawaii. But nooooo. That's

apparently not what's happening

with mother nature. I wonder if

I ever did something to provoke

her to make this weather make

me miserable.? No-I recycle.

Anyways..Kelly May you should

come to my house one of these days

because you're actually quite close

to me. And I haven't seen you in

quite awhile. But my mom keeps

being anal (is that spelt correctly?)

about our house being so sparkling

clean. And every 3 days she insists

we clean it..again. Well let me know

because I'm going crazy over here.

Except I'm about to go to my audition

so my mind is kind of occupied at the moment.

God bless me with some good luck, I want

this more than anythingggggg!

JB Recording "Poison Ivy"

2009-06-21T07:29:00.001-07:00

Following my dreams

2009-06-19T14:07:00.000-07:00

So today my mom, dad, sister, and I were on

our way to go shopping at Bridgewater falls

when I received a call from the producer

of the t.v. show I auditioned for last week.

.........................................................................

Monday I am scheduled to go back for a

CALLBACK! I know I know. woohoo Jenn

callback. But its exciting for me! A callback

is make-it-or-break-it. It's either sealing the

deal or losing the deal (deal or no deal-ha; like

the tv show) Anyyywhooooo...wish me luck,

keep your fingers crossed, and say a prayer

for me. Thanksss!! (:

& thank you Lord, I know this is all you. <3

'Black Keys' -JB

2009-06-18T07:35:00.000-07:00

She walks away
The colors fade to gray
Every precious moments now erased

She hits the gas
Hopeing it would pass
But the red light starts to flash
It's time to wait

And the black keys never looked so beautiful
And a perfect rainbow never seemed so dull
And the lights out
Never had this brighter glow
And the black keys showing me a world I never know
A world I never knew

She loves the sun
Cause it proves she's not alone
And the world doesn't revolve around your soul
She loves the sky cause it validates her pride
Never lets her know when is wrong

And the black keys never looked so beautiful
And a perfect rainbow never seemed so dull
And the lights out
Never had this brighter glow
And the black keys showing me a world I never know

Yeah
The walls are closing in
Don't let em get
Inside of your head
Don't let em get
Inside of your head
Don't let em get
Inside of your head
Don't let them inside

Cause the black keys never looked so beautiful
And a perfect rainbow never seemed so dull
Oh-oh
And the lights out never had this brighter glow
And the black keys showing me a world I never know

Don't let em get
Don't let em get
Inside of your head
No
Don't let em get yeah
Inside of your head
Don't let em get
Don't let em get
Inside of your head
Don't let em get
Oh-oh
Inside of your head

Sometimes a fight is better black and white

This weather is not what I like

2009-06-16T07:34:00.000-07:00

This stupid Ohio weather is making me gloomy.

This is called SUMMER VACATION..meaning

summer weather. Not depressing clouds and

rainy days. I want 90 degree weather, lots and

lots of sun to lighten my hair and darken my skin

and to make my pool look inviting! I always

ask the good Lord to please please please lighten

this weather and make it enjoyable to be outside

and not stuck indoors and boring..I guess he's just

making me wait a bit so that I will appreciate it

all that much more when it comes (in a week or two)

Okay God, I trust you man.

Newest Favorite song

2009-06-15T09:31:00.001-07:00

JONAS BROTHERS "TURN RIGHT"

I could pick up all your tears
throw em in your backseat
leave without a second glance
somehow i'm to blame
for this never-ending racetrack you call life

turn right
into my arms
turn right
you won't be alone
you might
fall off this track sometimes
hope to see you on the finish line

driving all your friends
At a speed they cannot follow
soon you will be on your own
somehow i'm to blame
for this never-ending racetrack we call life

turn right
into my arms
turn right
you won't be alone
you might
fall off this track sometimes
hope to see you on the finish line

i did all i could
and i gave
everything
but you had to go your way
and that road was not for me

so turn right
into my arms
turn right
you won't be alone
you might
fall off this track sometimes
hope to see you on the finish line

Sunday June 14, 2009

2009-06-14T16:49:00.002-07:00

KINGS ISLAND PICTURES :)

Me, Aaron(brother), and Jess(sister)

Jess & I with Diego!

Jess & I on the Beast

Kings Island

2009-06-14T13:09:00.000-07:00

WOOHOO! I love Kings Island.

This was my 2nd trip this season.

But this time instead of going with

my bestie, Marci, I went with my

familia (Mom, Dad, Aaron, friend-Mark,

and Jessica) It was so fun. But on Son of

Beast it was so wild it somehow worked

the ball of my bellybutton ring so i was

paranoid about it for the rest of the day.

But during lunch we saw a country performing

show and as silly as it was, I truly enjoyed it.

It started to rain towards the end but it felt

really good. The only scary thing was on the

way back it was storming and my sister was

driving my brother, his friend, and I and the

highway was flooded and we were going 15 MPH.

It was raining so hard you couldn't see anything!

But luckily God got us home safely. Thank you

Lord. Today was amazing. Anyone who has a gold

pass, let me know and we can go to Kings Island

(as long as I know you :P )

I wish

2009-06-12T19:36:00.001-07:00

I wish I had my own personal bible.

One that I could read every night before

I fell asleep. One that I could learn from.

One to make me a better person. To teach

me the ways of God and Christ. Some

people may not agree with me. But I,

I think it is a good, solid, thing to rely on.

Emotionally, mentally, yeah. All of that.

Sissy

2009-06-12T11:05:00.000-07:00

My sister is home :) Yay!

I was so excited that she's

home...but it feels like she never

left. This morning at like 9:30

I climbed into her bed and she

woke up and saw me (oops I

didn't mean to wake her). But

I had forgotten that she was even

home! Haha. Anyways, she is coming

to support me (along with my mom)

at my audition and then we're going

shopping and having a night out on

the town. Too bad this weather stinks.

Schedule

2009-06-10T10:31:00.000-07:00

Wednesday:Prepare ACT material

Thursday:Move Jess back home

Friday:Audition for trailer (TV series)

Saturday:Audition & ACT classes (9AM-6PM)

Sunday:ACT classes (9AM-6PM)

Monday:Catch up on sleep!

Tuesday:Jonas Brother's "Lines, Vines, and Trying Times" album comes out!

I'm busier in the summer than during the school year.

But it's a GOOD busy :)

Luck turning around?

2009-06-10T10:23:00.000-07:00

So Yeah I don't know how (or if) you can delete blogs posted. I accidentally

pressed 'enter' after typing the title to the blog posted before this but

whatever .

ANYWHO WHAT I WAS GOING TO SAY IN THAT WAS:

So my day isn't going so well. My mom is a ....yeah. and I'm

in pain (like heart attack pain) and I'm moping in my bed

just laying there playing around on my phone when my mom

storms in and throws the phone at me and says "here talk, its

your agency". Turns out they have an audition they want me to

go to Friday. It's for a trailer that a production company hopes

to bloom into a t.v. series if the trailer goes over well. Wish me

luck and hopefully this is the first step to following my dreams.

Thank you Lord. I promise to be loyal and faithful and work my

absolute hardest. Please watch over me.

Frustrating

2009-06-10T09:56:00.000-07:00

So my debit card number got hacked from a website I ordered

from and someone was using it. My mom called the bank and

told them. They blocked my card and looked into it. Turns

out they can't prove that someone else did it since they

have my card number and expiration date and everything.

So now my mom thinks I'm a retard and don't remember

using my card those days when I KNOW I didn't. God! She

thinks I'm lying to her about the whole thing now. Yeah, I'm

gonna tell you I didn't do those purchases, someone else did.

IT'S THE TRUTH. Good Lord I wouldn't lie about something

like this! And to top it all off I'm feeling stress in my chest and

it's like I'm having a freaking heart attack. Maybe if I keel over

dead my mom will believe me about all of this. DOUBT IT.

Jonas Brothers "Fly with Me"

2009-06-09T18:52:00.000-07:00

Thanks JayRae

2009-06-09T09:02:00.000-07:00

As you can see my blog looks much better

and more colorful and way cooler. all probos

(I'm not sure what "probos" means but I read

it somewhere so I hope I'm using it right) to

JESSICA RAE :) thanks hun!

I felt she deserved her own blog post

since she sent me the link to the site

that I got this awesome template from.

Blogging Retardation

2009-06-08T07:47:00.000-07:00

So I look at other people's blogs and

they're all decked out a d fancy and

then I see mine and how boring and

plain and simple it is. @#$%^&*

Would someone like to help

Jennifer and her rare Blogging

Retardation illness? that would be

great!! :)

It's tough being the slow one :\

Newest Favorite song

2009-06-08T07:35:00.001-07:00

JONAS BROTHERS: "FLY WITH ME"

If time was still The sun would never never find us We could light up The sky tonight I would see the world through your eyes Leave it all behind  If it's you and me forever If it's you and me right now That'd be alright Be alright We're chasing stars to lose our shadow Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine So won't you fly with me  Oh yeah Gotta fly with me now  Now the past Can come alive And give it meaning And a reason To give all I can To believe once again  If it's you and me forever If it's you and me right now That'd be alright Be alright We're chasing stars to lose our shadow Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine So won't you fly with me  Maybe you were just afraid Knowing you were miles away From the place where you needed to be And that's right here with me  It's you and me forever You and me right now That'd be alright We're chasing stars to lose our shadow Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine So won't you fly with me  If it's you and me forever If it's you and me right now I'd be alright Be alright We're chasing stars to lose our shadow Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine So won't you fly Fly Fly  With me

Jessica Lynn Wickman

2009-06-07T09:47:00.001-07:00

My sister comes home from college for the summer this friday

(6-12-09).I can't wait! My mom and I get to help her move out

and I get to ride with my sister for the 3 hours trip back. But

I'm super excited because I've missed her so much! Yesterday,

my mom and I went up there to take her some things to pack her

stuff into. We had our two puppies with us. Her boyfriend came

with us to dinner at Bennigan's (which is amazing!!) He is

a super sweet gentleman and he is so great to my sister

and he's really nice and social to me and my mom. Which is

a very good quality in a boy. I can't wait until he comes

and visits us this summer. I'm in such a great mood. Summer

fever has hit me and it has hit me hard. <3

Thurs/Fri 6/4 & 6/5

2009-06-05T06:00:00.000-07:00

Soo here it goes:

Movies with Marci, Sammi, & Casey (we saw Drag Me to Hell-freakky movie!)

Then me and Marci left to pick up our sibs from school and take them home.

Then we met Sammi and Casey at O'Charleys . Then we went back to Casey's

where we played Twister Moves & Catch Phrase. Sammi and I left to gas up

my car and stop by her house while Marci and Casey went to Marci's house

to get a phone charger and movies. Then we went back to Casey's and watched

The House Bunny and something else (I don't remember). Then we all got hungry

so me and Sammi made a late night run to McDonald's and Taco Bell. (After eating

McDonald's fries I seriously thought I had food poisoning because Sammi and I were

both feeling sick, and they were GROSS) Then we watched Twilight until 1AM (way

after Marci and Casey passed out) and Sammi and I shut it off and I layed in the

dark trying to fall asleep until almost 3AM! Then I woke up at 6AM because Marci

and I had planned to go to Waffle House after we dropped her sister off at school.

Turns out, we could go straight to Waffle House where we ran into my mom

and brother! :] We got free breakfast (mi madre paid (: ) and now I am waiting

for Marci to come over and we are going to lay out by my pool all day.

SWEET SUMMER TIME RIGHT?! :)

Funniest thing ever :)

2009-06-03T11:22:00.001-07:00

My mother

2009-06-02T14:59:00.001-07:00

Everyone has those moments when they can't stand

their mom. I have those often too. She gets in bad

moods and can be very irritable but at the end of

the day, I still love her. She supports me with

everything I do..or want to do. She's there to

laugh with, to cry with, to be bored with,

or just to be with. I know she'll go with me,

whichever way my path shall lead me. When

I was little, she would lead and I would follow.

Now, we stand side by side and conquer all

obstacles that stand before us. I love you Mom.

Summer

2009-05-30T15:24:00.000-07:00

This week coming up is exam week. I know I should study

my butt off for them but I can't bring myself to waste

that large amount of time. I know..that's ridiculous. This

summer I have set goals and aspirations for myself. I

cannot wait to see how my life changes this summer. I

hope, dream, pray, want, wish, feel, desire, ponder my

dreams every night before I fall asleep. I can lie awake

for hours just thinking about my dreams and the future.

I don't think about where I am now, or what I am doing

with my life now. I just think about where my life is going

and where I want it to go. I dream about what I want more

than anything. I really am a big dreamer. You guys have no

idea. I don't know how many people read my blog posts.

For all I know, this is my virtual diary and I am the only

one who sees it. Either way, I feel I can share these things

with anyone (or no one) on here.

Current Favorite song

2009-05-29T15:29:00.000-07:00

"Whoa Oh!" By-Forever The Sickest Kids

I candy-coat and cover everything
but I'm still hiding underneath
It's been a long time,
It's been a long time
A thousand faces looking up at me
hands all pointing to the ceiling
Oh what a feeling

I've got friends in highly low places
I'm standing on post, and I'm posted up
cant afford to lose them
I've got friends and highly low places
I'll go inside when I wanna party
Grab a girl and dance (don't touch me)

Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
Why do I put myself in these situations
Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
I keep pushing myself even though
I can't take it at all, whoa

Girl, who taught you how to move like that?
at this pace you're at you're at you're going way too fast
I, I saw you from across the room
It's me vs. every guy
It's your choice, you choose

I've got friends in highly low places
it's been a long time it's been a long time
and maybe baby you can rise above the rest to meet me

Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
Why do I put myself in these situations
Whoa Whoa oh Whoa oh,
I keep pushing myself even though
I can't take it at all
Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
Why do I put myself in these situations
Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
I keep pushing myself even though
I can't take it at all,

You're worth,
losing my self esteem
Your clever words mean
nothing more to me than
than a line i heard in a movie
You're worth,
losing my losing my losing my self esteem
You're not worth,
putting myself in these situations

Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
Why do I put myself in these situations
Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
I keep pushing myself even though
I can't take it at all
Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
Why do I put myself in these situations
Whoa oh Whoa oh Whoa oh,
I keep pushing myself even though
I can't take it at all

My new favorite song :D

2009-05-21T17:45:00.000-07:00

JONAS BROTHERS "PARANOID" :]

--loveee ittt <3--

i make the most of all the stress
i try to live without regret
but i m about to break a sweat
im freaking out
its like a poison in my brain
its like a fog that blurs the scene
its like a vine you cant untame
oh im freaking out
everytime i turn around
something dont feel right
i might be paranoid
im boarding the lines
cause they just might split
can someone stop the noise?
i dont know what it is
but it just dont fit
im paranoid
yeah

i take the next stairway steps
to get some air into my chest
cant hear the thoughts inside my head
im still freaking out
thats why my ex is stil lmy ex
i never trust a word she says
im runnin all the background checks
and shes freaking out

everytime i turn around somethings just not right
might be paranoid
im boardin the lines cause they just might split
can someone stop the noise?
i dont know what it is
but it just dont fit
consider me destroyed
cause i dont know how to act cause i lost my head
j i must be paranoid

i never thought it would come to this
im paranoid

stuck in the room
were staring faces
ohh
im caught in a nightmare
i cant wake up
if you hear my cry running threw her streets
im about to ffreak
come and rescue me

she might be paranoid
yeah
im boarding the lines cause they just might split
can someone stop the noise?
i dont know what it is
but it just dont fit
consider me destroyed
i dont know how to act cause i lost
cause i lost my head
i must be paranoid
i never thought it would come to this
im paranoid

Newest

2009-05-20T14:42:00.000-07:00

I just ordered a new iPod nano. I decided my old

nano has music on it that was from my old laptop

and so that library is gone and I don't want to mess

with it. My iPhone has my newest library and favorite

music on it but I don't want to jog or exercise with my

phone. So I decided to get a new one. It's a purple

nano. I got free engraving on the back. It says

"follow your dream (Jennifer Lynn)" I kind

of wish i would have put the Jonas Brother

quote "livin' the dream baby" or "Life's a climb,

but the view's great." from the Hannah Montana

movie. I don't really care though. But yeah that's

my exciting new news for the day.

Oh and my brother left for Washington D.C today

so I'm an only child until Saturday night. I pray

he is safe down there and really has a great time

and that God keeps my little brother safe all

the way through his journey home.

People

2009-05-18T16:28:00.001-07:00

I sometimes wish I was surrounded by more influential and inspirational people...

That's all I am going to say.

Good day.

My life:Update

2009-05-18T16:21:00.000-07:00

My life is something I like to blog about so one day a

few years from now, I can look back and think 'wow that's

what my life was like'...hopefully I'll be able to say "it was

so boring and slow compared to my life now"Obviously I

like life in the fast lane. I'm a going, going, and keep on

going type of person. I keep swimming..even against the

current. This wasn't my point of this blog but it seems

like a good path to travel along. Ever since I have been

doing schooling on my own terms my life has been the

way I want it. I finish school work around 10-11 A.M.

then I read, do yoga/pilates/walk my dog at the park/

bike ride. I stay active. I practice my violin and keep

time to myself. I like being alone. I honestly don't mind.

When I listen to music, I let my mind wander wherever

it wants. Usually I end up day dreaming about how I

want my life and where I want to be. My mind is never

blank. Maybe that's why I have troubles falling asleep

and then staying asleep. I spend more time at night lying

awake thinking when I really should be letting my mind

rest. It's not something I can truly control. I've tried

many times, but all attempts prove futile. Well I

am sorry for boring you all, my blogging friends.

I will be back (manana) tomorrow to tell you what

new thoughts have creeped into my mind when it

really should be vacant. Adios.Chao. Goodbye.

Weekend-5/15/09

2009-05-16T04:42:00.000-07:00

So yesterday my mom and I picked my brother

up from school and went to eat at O'Charleys.

After that me and my mom went shopping

at Macys. YAYY shoppping :D and now for

the rest of the weekend I will be at my

acting classes for a total of 18 hours.

@#$%^&* happy weekend right?

Ohio Weather gets me Down

2009-05-14T08:17:00.000-07:00

Ohio is a state that experiences all four seasons...in one week.

The beginning of this week was sunny and mostly warm and

beautiful. As of yesterday, it's been rainy and stormy and

chilly outside. It stormed all night last night. It's under

constant cloud cover and it's getting me down. I don't

like wet, cold, cloudy and depressing weather. I like

it warm and sunny and bright! I think I'll try to convince

my mom to let us move somewhere with consistently

gorgeous weather. It really is true that the weather

affects your mood. When it's sunny I'm happy and

bouncy and outside being active. When it's rainy I'm

sad and lazy and sleepy and I feel like a bum because

I can't do things outside.. *sighhhh*

My Tues. May 12, 2009

2009-05-12T18:33:00.000-07:00

Well I did my school work this morning.

After that I read my newest favorite book

'The Alchemist' (by Paulo Coehlo) outside.

It was a little chilly but gorgeously sunny.

I had lunch with my momma. Then we

left to pick my brother and his friend

up from school. After we dropped them off

we had to go out to Versailles, IN for my

dentist appointment. Then my mom and I

went to dinner at Golden Corral. It was amazing

but we ate so much. So, when we got home we

decided to go for a bike ride at the park. When

we got back we chilled in the backyard playing

with out dogs and enjoying the sunset. I just

finished my pilates workout and now I'm

going to finish 'The Alchemist'.

I have no class connects tomorrow

so I can sleep in. And since it will be

rainy, I will be stuck indoors doing

indoorsy stuff all day. I love my life!

My weekend

2009-05-11T16:39:00.000-07:00

So Friday night I went to my brother's confirmation.

(I was his sponsor). And after we went out to eat. My

best friend, Marci, came over and spent the night. The

next day (Saturday) we all went to Kings Island. (Yes,

we rode Diamondback...twice. It was pretty thrilling).

Saturday night my mom, brother, and I went to my

cousin's graduation party. She just graduated from

college. Sunday my mom and I took a road trip to

Ohio University to visit my older sister, Jessica. We

surprised her with her dog, Kasey. It was so fun seeing

(and hearing) her be surprised. Haha! We had lunch

with her and then went walking around a bit on campus.

It was a fun weekend. And I was totally exhausted today!

My newest YouTube video

2009-05-10T17:30:00.000-07:00

This is me and my best friend, Marci. We have some crazy and funny times at night. Watch it, you'll laugh! :D

Contributions

2009-05-05T14:12:00.000-07:00

In order to work towards my goal of being a "better me"

i just spent the last hour (which I would normally be

watching 'The. O.C' on soapnet) and I biked 14 miles

which include lots and lots of hills. I rode to the bike

trail (3 miles away) I biked the entire trail (8 miles) and

then I biked back (3 miles). wow those hills are killers..

especially going UP! haha. and for those of you checking

my math right now: let me help you out (3+3(=6)+8=14)

Yes! I did it and later on tonight I'm going to do my daily

pilates workout for 40 minutes and yoga for atleast 30

very soon here. I hope I inspire others to be healthier

because it truly does make you feel a lot better about

yourself...oh and it was some good quality time with my

little brother.

TWITTER

2009-05-04T12:19:00.000-07:00

I know there's a thing on the side of my blog

about my twitter account. but I though I

would advertise in a blog as well. I want

as many followers on twitter as possible.

so either follow me through the thing on

the side or go to my twitter profile :

http://twitter.com/jennwickman

Love is on its way

I'm baaack

Good Lord!

Its destiny

Can somebody help me..

I've just realized

Texts from Last night

Meet Blanket

"Mommywood" Tori Spelling

Feel free to laugh...

"Crash Into Me" Albert Borris

"Message in a Bottle" Nicholas Sparks

Why not

I must finish what I started

Is this a bad thing??

August 26-27

"You Are Here" Jennifer E. Smith

"The Choice" Nicholas Sparksw

ugaahh

Wow.

Why I had a good day

"sTORI Telling" Tori Spelling

Rambling

Heath Ledger's last film (trailer)

"are u 4 real?" Sara Kadefors

Warning

"The Chosen One" Carol Lynch Williams

e.E. Charlton Trujillo

"If the Witness Lied" Caroline B. Cooney

"The Lucky One" :Nicholas Sparks

weekend away

Oh good Lord

What to do?

You may not know that:

I saw God today

Good parts of life

Belittled

Here we go again

I'm just gonna vent here

Blast from the past

Necessito sus opinones

I miss my friend..

Pumpkin after Catnip consumption

New experience

"Dont wanna be torn"

So far so great

Filming schedule

Employed!

"Identical" Ellen Hopkins

'Miles to Go' Miley Cyrus

f_ _ _mylife

This is what it's come to (I'm a nerd) aka*bookworm*

Love this song

All in all

Quote of my life

Dream big

Torture

Linsay Lohan- down the tubes

Current obsessive song

Holy crap-RIP Billy Mays

CPDRC "Thriller" dance routine

R.I.P MJ

Inspiring song

Offically diagosed with Blogging addiction

PicShare

Discovery

Laaaame

JB Recording "Poison Ivy"

Following my dreams

'Black Keys' -JB

This weather is not what I like

Newest Favorite song

Sunday June 14, 2009

Kings Island

I wish

Sissy

Schedule

Luck turning around?

Frustrating

Jonas Brothers "Fly with Me"

This is what it's come to (I'm a nerd) akabookworm